I Feel Like the Fucking Kid

It's the classic out of my control I'm under 21 bullshit that one encounters when all you want to do is go out with your friends, but you're not allowed to due to your age. (I'm pretty sure I have bitched about this before).

Tonight was a going away/birthday party for a close friend of mine who turned 23. We went bowling to start off the night. Now I've been looking forward to tonight all week, I wanted to see my friend before she moved away. Not to mention that I don't go out as much as I used to, so being invited to ANY event is a huge deal.

Anyway, we bowl for about two hours (I sucked both games). I'm having an awesome time and would probably be there all night if I could. Well, with any birthday over your 21st, one has to go to more than just one place. So naturally everyone 21 and up wanted to go to the bar. I pretty much broke down crying after everyone left and called my boyfriend (Yeah, I call my boyfriend because I feel like I don't have a best friend to cry to...so my boyfriend is my best friend...you know what I mean) Now I'm just sobbing on the phone and disclosing every single thing I'm upset about at this very moment: Best friend is moving, I can't fucking go anywhere, I'm working shitty shifts all next week, my pending grades (Which I have to brag for a second and tell you that I got all A's :)), and how I'm horrible at keeping friendships.

He told me something that I do need to take more seriously. That everyone has been through this situation, and that I need to stop comparing myself to others.

I do hate to admit it but it's true. I try to come off as this independent and strong women, when in reality I do compare myself to my other salespeople, students, professionals, etc. I need to learn to appreciate my own strengths. I also need to accept that my time definitely will come. I need to keep in contact with my friends, I need to get shit done before NYC, I need to do so much that I'm stressing the hell out about it, which is probably the reason why I broke down and decided to call.

Done now, see you when my next breakdown happens.

The Showgirl Inside Me

At the end of every day, which for me involves a part-time job, a full-time student schedule, and various other activities, there is one thing that ends my perfect day before I go to bed. I do the usual: combing my hair and washing my face. But the equivalent of coming home from a long day and kicking your shoes off infront of the television is when I'm in the middle of changing into my pajamas and I take off my bra. I really don't mean to sound weird. (Actually, I do). But to my all female followers of this blog (Which I'm sure anyway you don't read), give it a try. There's something magical about relieving the body of any kind of restrainst (shoes, bras, etc.) Or if you already agree with me, share your thoughts. Underwire may be an amazing invention, but it gets to a point when there simply needs to be some breathing room.

Am considering going back to my old routine: feminist friday.

Also reading the Delta of Venus, which gave me a little inspiration to write about my boobs.

http://seriesofhopes.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/nin-anais-delta-of-venus.pdf

Also still studying the art of Burlesque. I now have such idols such as Dita von Teese, Veronica Varlow, Michelle L'Amour, and Jo "Boobs" Weldon. All of them such beautiful women whom I hope to perform with someday.

Wallabee

Such a fun word. Wallabee.

Quite the adventure today. And oddly enough, it didn't start off in my car. Instead, I went for a bike ride. I haven't ridden my bike in months due to the hot summer Arizona hell-storm that is summer. So it was very nice to finally hop back on that rickety POS that is my cheap Wal-mart cruiser. Even though it feels like its going to fall apart at any moment, it has a certain charm about it.

It's a boy's bike, but I really didn't care about the gender of the bike only because I liked the color. It's a bit of a gay hipster, but beautiful anyway. And when I ride it, I love hearing all the little squeaks, clicks, and grinds while I pass under the shaded trees and feel the wind on my face. It is probably the most relaxing way to do a cardio exercise.

My day consisted of costumes, beautiful stringed instruments, and working. Lots of working. My feet hurt so badly that they are having their own cramps. Not to mention all the noobs at work whom I have to hold their hand and stay 30 minutes after my shift is supposed to end to teach them for the 7th time how to close a register. It's all good though. I'll hold the hands of ten different seasonal noobs to get me through the retail hell that is Christmas and survive yet another year.

9 more months till New York. Will it be a boy or a girl?

Lunchtime!

Hanging with the men of the household. Dad and dog. We're installing a TV. Well, he is, I'm sitting here on the computer watching him do all this. I love moments like these. Just chillin' and listening to music. These past few weeks have just been Rush! Go! Rush! It's been pretty busy. I'm glad that I get to spend some time with my dad though. :)

I've also been working every single night. And I'm coming down with a cold. :( But that really doesn't stop me from going out at night. I went out with my friend last night and afterward went to wonderful boyfriend's house. We watched Arrested Development and cuddled. It's really an amazing and well-written show. If you haven't seen it yet, then go and watch it RIGHT NOW.

So, I've been listening to the radio the entire time I've been writing this. And this song called Love in America comes on. I just have to say that the lyrics, "Come on and shake your money maker!" shouldn't be sung like you're on a freaking episode of Barney. I await the day children are quoting what they've heard of Radio Disney and are singing, "Come on and shake your money maker." while skipping on their way to kindergarten.

I was just browsing through the little "extras" that google has to offer for its customers, and I came across the "make your own website" option. I gave it some thought and figured it would be pretty cool, but then I realized that I barely get on this, so there wouldn't really be any point.

Well, going to work and then to a cast party. I need some fun. :)

Uninvited

This summer, I had the grand opportunity to accomplish one of my many life-long dreams. I went to Prague for a fabulous study abroad. I studied Intercultural Communications and International Business. I was taking weekend excursions to Vienna, Austria and Germany. I was in a continent where I could buy alcohol without getting carded.

So why is it that I'm sitting alone in my house on a Saturday night reminiscing about my summer?

Because once again, I didn't fit in. I don't fit in. I'm sitting here watching my dog snore and staring blankly at my report that's due next week that I absolutely loathe. (Yes, I'm procrastinating). I'm sitting home alone feeling sorry for myself because during that entire month I stayed in that dorm, living my dream, I couldn't make one friend. That's right. As hard as I tried, and as hard as I tried to stay in contact, I'm still the outcast and I'm still unaccepted into their little bullshit group. There was a reunion party tonight that I just found out about with people from all three of the colleges going, and I wasn't invited.

There's nothing really exciting in my life right now. The only thing I really have to look forward to is moving out in A YEAR. But for now, I feel like I just waste the days away working and going to school. I watch the people around me actually doing things with their lives right now while I just keep telling myself, "Don't worry your time will come." Today I went to a play, and I was introduced to some really interesting people that have really interesting jobs in the theater community and I was asked the question that I hate most, "So what do you do?" What is it exactly that I do? "Oh I just wish time away till I could actually do something." is what I wish I could say. Or, "Oh, I just go to community college because my financial aid fell through, I work as a cashier, and I watch the people around me do really amazing things with their happy lives." Well, I must say that I've actually made 2 or 3 new friends since the last time I bitched on this blog. I need a hobby.

Hipocracy pt. II

Wonderful boyfriend wonderfully told me that his wonderful band is going to be in a wonderful concert at the end of this wonderful month. Unfortunately, the concert is located out of my usual vicinity which presents a problem on my behalf. Having old-fashioned parents has it's ups and downs. We eat dinner as a family, we sew, we go for long walks and bike-rides, we support one another, etc. But when it comes to breaking out of the traditional norm and trying new things, making new friends and attempting to embrace my youth while I still acceptably can, they freak out and start with the name-calling, labeling, and all of this other bull shit. It feels like two parts of my life can't be in harmony and I'm currently having a nervous breakdown. I'm going through enough funks as it is (uninspired, working too much, lack of a social life as it is, etc) and having this is just the fuckin' cherry on top. I'm not involved in much, my friends are moving on with their lives, and I'm still stuck here in the middle of the desert. They would be willing to set me loose in a foreign country for an entire month, but not let me have an adventure in my own home state for one night with people that they actually know.

Lucid Dreaming

I've done it everyone. I can't believe I haven't done it before, but I have now done it. I can now lucid dream my (extremely rare) "dreams of extreme passion". I can't saw that I could control what I see in the dream, but how i feel. It was a very new experience. I don't know why I'm blogging this (actually I do) because lately that has been the most exciting thing that's happened. (Sad, I'm quite aware).

In other news, I'm fighting this illness that's kept me from doing anything for the past two weeks. I'm starting to feel like a human again, and I'm able to go to work now, but good god I hate being sick... I'm just repeating my rants from last October 2009.

Anyways, I was put on the spot in work today. Didn't know that Haitians spoke French. So when I had a Haitian family figure out that I spoke French, they didn't hesitate to start picking on my accent and whatnot. But the thing that bothered me the most was that I had a lot of trouble picking up my vocabulary. I need to start studying the language again because I'm not using it as often as I should. Practice makes perfect. Although perfect is pretty much unattainable, I really should be practicing more.

Fascinating Adventures in a World of Darkness

Disclaimer: This post is not me being emotional. On the contrary, it's me being a complete fuckin' nerd.

I've been needing a vacation for a very long time. That's pretty much all I did when I was little because (back in the day) schools were lenient, and I took vacations with my family all the time. But these days it's just been work and school. But that all changed this weekend. I didn't go anywhere, but it's how I spent all my free time that made it amazing. I spent the entire two days I had with my boyfriend house-sitting and pretty much playing house while my family was camping. I couldn't have asked for a better time. Sometimes all you need is a few glasses of wine, a record player, and a little Adventure Time with your loved ones. I'll admit it, I'm a pretty simple creature.

In other news, a recent video game addiction I've been having is Kirby's Epic Yarn (Specifically in 2 player mode). Firstly: It doesn't piss me off. Which is pretty important. Secondly: 2-player mode actually contains TEAMWORK. Which seems to be such a strange concept with my collection of video games. I'm just used to killing the other person or making them eat my dust in a damn good race. Anyway, I highly recommend. It's amazing and I couldn't be more in love with the concept.

A Breath of Fresh Air

I'm not going to lie, but December was shit.

Work, finals, you know the usual drill. I just had these off and on depressions where everything just seemed like the same old thing. Granted, Christmas was great, I got a gorgeous record player. It's just that I'm ready to get back into the swing of things and start school once again.

But on December 31st, 2010, everything changed. I felt like how a 19 year old on New Years Eve should feel like. Who knew that a punk rock concert, some old and new friends, the love of my life, and my own personal bottle of Cabernet could fix that December funk that I was in. I'm so proud to say that I spent my new years right and I'm very much looking forward to 2011, because let's face it...2010 kindof sucked.

I would also like to post my new years resolutions as well:

Firstly: Learn to cook. Yeah, 19 and still cannot cook for the life of me. Simply put: I was never taught. It was just one of those things that I cast aside and never bothered to learn. Granted I could make the standard Ramen, Grilled Cheese, and basic college dorm food. It is just the reassurance that I would be able to survive on my own for whenever I move out.

Secondly: Write more. Which is pretty generic of me to say, but it's the truth. I've been on writer's block with my current novel for a good three or so months. I'll confess that it is due to a lack of inspiration (and a small addiction to Zelda and Sims 3). But today my boyfriend told me something which made me rethink the way I've been neglecting this skill, (and I cannot quote him word for word at the moment) but he basically told me to practice writing every single day. How are you going to be good at something if you don't practice? Even if its something little like a diary entry, a short story, or working on your novel. Thus, I am inspired again because he's right. I don't have to be working on just that novel. Hell, just as long as I write I'll be satisfied. Writing this out now has been clearing my head and getting me to focus again.

Anyway, I wish everyone a wonderful new year. And I have one more announcement to make:

So far I've treated this blog with monthly updates, but starting now for 2011 and to go with my new years resolution, I'll be updating and utilizing this site more often. So no more once a month posts.

Love Actually

Today was much needed. I've successfully had an unsuccessful day by watching my favorite romantic comedies (Bridget Jones, Love Actually...etc), eating a jar of Nutella, and enjoying a visit from boyfriend. (There really needs to be a new word for boyfriend if their already in their twenties. And man-friend is too awkward to say and sounds like a nickname for a dog, and guy-friend is too casual) I've had the last three days off from work, (which was also much needed, considering 35 hr work week last week and black Friday) and spent the last few days actually doing my homework, having a ladies night, and hanging around the house decorating for Christmas.

What else is new in my life? Recently, I won a scholarship (finally) for the college I'm going to right now, because NYC didn't work out this year. Which also means that I'll be doing a study abroad next June in the beautiful city of Prague!

I've been dreaming all my life to do a student exchange or a study abroad while i was in college and now ITS FINALLY HAPPENING! It's only for a month, but honestly that's all the time that I need. ( I unfortunately get homesick too easy, even though I try to seem more independent than I actually am).

Hipocracy

In times of stress, I find writing my main outlet.

I just got off the phone with my boyfriend, who's sweet enough to support anything that I feel like doing. This week it has been Roller Derby.

When I was little, my family and our neighbors went to a friend's roller derby match. It was definitely a culture shock, but my god did I have a good time. Unfortunately I was the only one that did. Parents didn't approve too much of watching women beat each other on the track. Did I want to do that at the time? Heck no, those girls could break me, and I was like 10 or something, and I just shoved the into a memory, not a wish.

Recently I watched a movie called Whip It! and it got me thinking again. Now, I'm a fan of any sport that allows beating like Rugby or Hockey. So as I was watching this I thought to myself, now there's a sport that's for chicks AND I get to beat people. THIS IS AWESOME. Boyfriend hasn't been to a roller derby match, so I got in contact with the daughter of the friend who was in that match from forever ago and she gave me the poster from the website about the championship match. But, we weren't able to go.

Last night, Boyfriend went to a concert and who was at that concert, but THE ROLLER DERBY TEAM, saying that they were holding try-outs for next season. In the middle of talking to him on the phone this morning, mother walks in and asks what we were talking about. I said, "We were talking about trying out for the Roller Derby team." Her face sunk, her eyes got wide, and I got a firm "No, Aila. That's gutter." I really didn't know what to make of that. "Don't let him drag you into the gutter." I just can't believe how hypocritical she was being. This was the woman I looked up to for guidance and whom I thought a woman should be.

I really hate choosing sides. It's simply something that isn't in my nature. I also don't see people as gutter or rich snobs. What i'm trying to say here is that we have one life that's way too short to be worrying about social class, staying true to a certain group, or trying to be the perfect ideal person. Dye your hair pink, backpack across Europe, and go make a stand... I just wish I was brave enough to take my own advice.

Recovery

It's true what they say about high school, "Enjoy it while it lasts because everything changes when you graduate." And my world was turned upside down.

The night of graduation was nothing but partying, drinking, smoking, dancing, and celebrating this new chapter in our lives and entering the adult world. This lasted about three days: Celebrating, saying our goodbyes, and enjoying the beginning of summer.
Everything was going as I imagined, until about 4 days in.

I wasn't looking forward to having my tonsils removed that Wednesday, I knew that it would take a lot out of me to recover from the physical pain. So I wanted to spend as much time as I could with my loved ones before I went into the dreaded recovering state. It came from nowhere, and I didn't know what to make of it. But what happened next was a blur. I felt my tears running down my cheeks for 3 days. I granted him too much. I hated myself for acting this way. It was the one thing that I despise most in the world: Pathetic. Throughout my life, I was raised to be strong, independent, and I refused to let anyone take me down.

"You come from a long line of strong and beautiful women, Aila. Don't let any man or woman make you feel less."

This is why I didn't tell anyone for three weeks after it happened. The last thing I needed was everyone's pity. The only people that knew were my parents. I didn't know who to hate, I didn't know why it happened, I didn't know how to feel, and I hated myself for it. And as I recovered from the physical pain of the tonsilectomy and I switched from codine to tylenol, reality hit me like a slap in the face. Not only was I recovering physically, but emotionally I was numb. That Saturday kept replaying in my mind over and over and over, again and again. I thought about it so much, that I started picking apart at the reality of the situation. I compared what I had with successful and unsuccessful couples in my life. I've come to this conslusion about love:

-Love really is a bitch. You never know what it's going to do. It could either stab you in the heart, or it can make it grow. And it's unbelievable how many people risk it all.
-Love is when you always want to be with eachother. You can't stand being apart from them and would be willing to make sacrifices to be with that person.
-Time doesn't matter.

And with that, I found the strength to hold my head a little higher. I have to move on, human nature expects me to. And hopefully getting out of this hellhole will take my mind off of things and open myself to something more. Knowing that I'm able to write this out shows how much I've healed as it is. My heart still feels like it's been used, but I'm finding an outlet through my friends.

A kiss
A cuddle
A smile
A lie

It's been fun. Thanks for the memories.

Did I Miss Something?

This month has been blah. I'm quite sick of the fact that everyone is either changing around me or staying the same and I feel like I'm ready to move on. I'm absolutely done with High School and ready to move on to the college life. I'm so close to finally receiving the independence I've been dreaming about, but there are still obsticles to overcome. From this piont on, I'm just sticking to what I know, what I love, and what will make me a better person in time. I can be heartless at times, I'll admit that. Well, only two more school days and a graduation ceremony to get through and It's all relaxation and enjoying my sweet sexy time. God bless summer.

I believe what I'm trying to get at is that It's time for some change. I'm ready to move to NYC. I can't emphasize that enough, but when you come from a traditional family where, let's face it, change is NOT good....because it changes things....the likelihood of reaching this goal and making everyone happy is slim. There, that's my problem: "Making everyone happy."I realize that I have to think for myself. It's just difficult leaving when your job isn't over yet as an older sibling. If there's one person that I know I'd miss, it's my sister.

Baby Face

Today should have been a Friday, and I'm pretty pissed that it wasn't. Senioritis is getting to everyone and it's pretty obvious. But with only 2.5 weeks of school left I can't help but wonder, "Wow, it's really almost over." We had a graduation rehearsal in the auditorium which meant that I didn't have to go to Halocaust Literature (Which really should have been called Halocaust Cinema because we havn't read a book since january and we're stuck there watching movies every week).

Probably the highlight of my day though was the Yearbook Signing Party. It wasn't the party itself that made my day, but the waiting for 3 hours after school to get into the party and I discovered that if you have a bored group, a pizza, and a Cosmopolitan at hand, the hours just seem to fly by.

I'm just rambling aout my day, yes, but I havn't written in a while. Pretty sleepy, I shall write more later in the month.

NARCISSISM! D:

Haws Legs: n: Short muscular legs that look awful in everything and you wish would go away.

I really do hate shopping. I start off great and I get really into looking for a great top to go with that skirt at home or a beautiful new cardigan. I go through every rack with a determined look in my eyes. I pick out what I like. I go to the dressing room. And I start trying on one thing at a time. And gradually I start to hate myself. I notice every flaw that I couldn't see before.

Usually I'm not like this and I'm thankful for what god has given me. But I see my 6 foot 115lbs sister try on what she likes and...well...i'm jealous. Some people stare at themselves long enough in mirrors that they start loving themselves. (YAY NARCISSISM!) I'm the opposite in the sense that I stare long enough and I start to hate myself. What's wrong with me? I see the world in a way that many don't. I see it in angles, textures, and basically a beauty in everything and everyone. It's the daydreamer in me, but I feel lucky. So my problem is this: If I could see everyone in a beautiful way, why can't I see myself?

Maybe it's just teenagerhood catching up with me or I'm reaching that stage in my life where I hate everything that I am, see, do, etc. Everyone goes through it, and I'm glad it's happening now rather than, for example, when I'm 30-something in the prime of my life working in my dream profession. Get this stage out of the way. I'm going to NYC for college. That is the one place where you can't bring yourself down. Hell, I'm feeling better just writing this whole rant out.

Knit Beanies and Fat Tire

I think I'm gaining weight. I don't like it. I don't like it one bit. The stress is all over and done with for The Princess Bride (Which we had an amazing turnout and I certainly feel like I went out with a bang!) and it's about time that I relax.

At least I've been able to spend time with the ones I love. It's probably the greatest stress reliever of all. My Italian family flew in from North Carolina and Georgia to see me perform and we've been hanging around all weekend. Not to mention the celebrating for Princess Bride.

February in general has been a stressful month. Drama, drama, and more drama. I try my hardest not to bring it upon myself, but it always seems to find a way. But you know what? No matter what the conflict is, there's a way to solve it. The option probably isn't abailable to you, but there's always alternatives. In other words, whatever happens, happens.

A new year of firsts

There's something about waking up in the arms of the one you love to realize that everything is just perfect and right at this moment in time. That all the worries about school or drama between friends or whatever doesn't matter. It's the simple moments that put a smile on your face. And with that, my new years resolution is to live more in the now. Everything was meant to happen for a reason and accept the fact that time will run its course and to enjoy it while you can.

There's so much to look forward to this year! Princess Bride in February, Prom in April, Graduation in May, SUMMER, Starting a new chapter of my life iwith college in a new city come fall, a lot of trasitioning will be happening this year.

So much has happened in the past few weeks. New years and Christmas were biggies. Grandma gave me a ukulele for Christmas and I haven't put the thing down since then. I've spent a lot of time with my friends partying, hooka, jam sessions, and just hanging out. I'm so far very satisfied with my winter break and I think that this is the best start for the new year. Speaking of new years, I believe I had the best one of my life! Usually, I would go with my family to my neighbor's house and be bored the entire night watching new years eve specials by my self on their couch and leave immediately after we're done celebrating the midnight ball drop at Times Square to go talk to my friends on the internet.
This year, however, was my first one to be shared. It was the first time all break where I didn't have to worry about a curfew and that I got to spend with people I knew I would have a great time with. After much dancing, sitting around the fire, hottubbing, ball dropping, kissing, and hanging out around 4 in the morning, I greeted 2010 with open arms. BRING ON THE NEW YEAR!

J'ai des yeux verts

Where are you Christmas? Why can't I find you? Why WON"T YOU GET HERE FAST ENOUGH!?

I hate uneventful days. Like today. It just didn't go by fast enough. It's not a great idea to wish your days away, but my god, Final review packets and watching Fred Claus and Ratatouille over and over again is the worst. I'm just happy that today was the last day of reviewing and we could finally get this show on the road Thursday and Friday.

In other news--
I have so much to memorize this winter break it's not even funny. I have a page and a half of Monologue plus all the lines of Buttercup for Princess Bride. I also have unwanted house guests, several knitting projects to do, and studying. There is not enough hours in my day, that's for sure.

I swear, I'm just going to go crazy this break and do all that I want to do.
Bonfires, hubbly bubbly, Christmas, partying
Let's go crazy.

Je me demande...

It wasn't one of the greatest of days. Someone says they're impressed with your work and to not change a thing. You get so proud that you show it to another person and it turns out there's improvement. I put this on repeat for the past few days. From the essays to the projects, I cannot emphasize the constant changes to be made for that "perfect grade" for that "perfect student". It's a lot more work than one thinks. And pressure isn't good for a sicky.

I feel like I'm going downhill. I'm not and I have a good excuse, but it's getting harder and harder to keep up with finals just around the corner. I just wish I could start over. I wish I didn't get mono. It's so hard to take one step at a time and keep up with everyone.

I'm thankful for my friends. They just seem to be my stress reliever now. But how often do I get to see them? Classrooms and passing classes aren't exactly the best places to relax and enjoy the company. I need to learn to relax again. I could feel that uptight worrying me coming back. I would ask for a break, but that doesn't seem to be the answer.

I miss the old times. And by old times I mean July through October. God, why did I have to get sick? Staying out late, parties, Truth or Dare?, Repo, Sonic, dancing, singing, romance, Hubbly Bubbly, Mill Ave, and theatre. I tend to say my summer lasted 4 weeks. 2 weeks in Germany, 2 weeks before school started. I'm starting to forget the rest. I love the feeling of starting off new in the school year, everything is beginning to settle. I thrive in constant energy and motion.

Lazy and uninspired is no way to go through life. This isn't me, but I have no choice but to face it now. Fuck you too, mono.

Today I had an anxiety attack. Lasted a long time too. It's this sick feeling in your stomach that stays there all day long and in one second your heart starts racing and you feel like fainting on the spot. Damn auditions. Once again, nervous, scared me is coming out. I think I'm just afriad of wasted work and disappointment.

I feel like an ass for just complaining on the internet. But god does it feel good to just write down whatever comes to your mind.

Bluntness Over Emotion

Anyone can blog. It's just that the good one's I have read are deep, insightful, and you find yourself really getting into the mind of the author.
That isn't me. I don't have long, thought out sentences and I'm too reserved in my writing. So there you have it: BLUNT.

This is something that's been bugging me lately. I'm very open and have no problems expressing myself, it's just that when it comes to written word I find myself just listing events and what happened. Not getting too much in my mind, just reading events. I have no opinion most of the time. I don't delve deep into my thoughts. My diary is just stuff that has happened that day, not what I think about current situations, not trying to figure out the meaning of life, just an unopinionated reporter of my life.

I just hope this to be a learning experience.

How has life been today? Well, today in particular, it sucks. Went to the doctor's today to find out I have bronchitis and a good reminder that my spine is crooked. Thanks.

Life in the general present? Pretty awesome!
I've spent the last week and a half going out with friends and having the time of my life. What should have been happening all summer should have happened in these 1.5 weeks: Bowling, Swimming, long walks while holding hands, crashing eachother's houses and staying up till 1am. I'm slowly, but surely, learning how to relax thanks to a certain someone. It was all worth the bronchitis.